I completed this interview under Jackie Schuld’s questions. She has conducted a whole series of late-identified autism interviews with people. https://medium.com/@jackieschuld/list/late-identified-autistic-interviews-f6214bb999ce This is a personal expansion to the interview she posted of me previously. How old were you when you learned you are autistic? At age 23 I began researching…

A positive remembrance of personships past. First of the series is linked below: Lost Personships #1 I have, like everyone, experienced personships that used to be good but turned into something irreparable; ones in…mistralspace.medium.com * During the times I spent interacting with Alex, I had never connected in this way with someone in my life. I was in high school when I met him online, on Facebook. It was an exciting…

I have, like everyone, experienced personships that used to be good but turned into something irreparable; ones in which I lost respect for the other or otherwise ended up not liking them; ones which faded away and I’m not sure what happened; ones where I liked them but they decided…

SoundCloud link for natural narration: https://on.soundcloud.com/QQJEn Another pointless day The seconds drag past as if they’re clawing me further and further into the ground The ground is where I belong so deem my experiences, challenges, disillusionment, suffering, the nothingness that yawns in front of my eyes, an existence without bearings …

I’d like to celebrate my birthday this year. My feelings about it have actually maneuvered in a positive direction this time around. I would like to acknowledge it, engage in the tradition of celebrating one’s existence, make it a happy day. …

SoundCloud link for natural narration: https://on.soundcloud.com/VDgZU The desk stands as a monument to the relationship gone wrong To opportunity gone past . I’d asked my mom to buy the desk and I would pay her back So as to get the discount cardholders could get She asked, ‘Might you want…

Successfully “Humaning” ~ part 4 of 4 The impaired drive and difficulty with follow-through, the reticence which could overlay my existence in my adolescence and younger adulthood, largely stemmed from these adverse life components>lacking a solid persona in the world, lacking meaningful connection, and not having much sense of support or feeling of interconnectedness with those around…

Successfully “Humaning” ~ part 3 of 4 It’s unfortunate I was not able to take advantage of the college environment, with its atmosphere of learning and progression, its resources, activities, and clubs. I didn’t actually feel a ‘part’ of that environment, didn’t possess the agency and skills to be a more involved go-getter. I still felt woefully…

Successfully “Humaning” ~ part 2 of 4 The immense difficulty and, at times, seeming futility of human interaction and self-expression essentially allowed no other option than to be withdrawn into myself since I couldn’t find a way to fully be involved. I was energetically backed against a wall. It was hard to even pretend to be something…